Crow Alert....Crow Alert.....

Hide Ya Kids.....Hide Ya Wives and DEFINITELY Hide Ya Husbands........This is an EMERGENCY Alert for the state of Virginia. There seems to have been a significant migration of Crows from the Great State of Texas to Virginia. It is reported that in Virginia the Texas Crows joined forces with the Virginia Crows. The specific city in Virginia will not be made public as to avoid panic in the streets. This migration will cause a tremendous change in the atmosphere, water pressure as well as a decrease of adult beverages on store shelves. It is also advised that ear plugs be used by the citizenry when not in sound proof rooms. Hospitals should be on alert for broken toes and scrapped arms. If you have a SAFE room in your house, USE IT at this time. This emergency alert should remain in effect until at least Wednesday. At that point they are EXPECTED to leave the state. As to their ability TO BE ABLE to leave that day....well, we'll just have to wait and see. There may or may not be massive piles of chin hairs on city streets. There most assuredly will be synchronized swimming that we can only hope will NOT be captured by any news team and aired on television. If one has a small child and lives in Virginia, it is advised that possibly you should AT ALL TIMES have your child's ears covered as well as plugged;teen curfews should be strictly enfored. One can never be too careful. If you have the means and time to evacuate, it is advised that you take action NOW. If by chance you hear The Eyes of Texas being sung by a choir of Crows...then you must take heed. Look neither to the right nor left. Walk quickly with your head down. You are in a Crow Overload area at that point. Be advised that Wills and Legal Powers of Attorney should be updated. Life and Health insurance should be in place. While not the end of the world, it is a significant advisory....stay safe Virginia....and the world wishes you Godspeed.